A few quotes and jokes

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Re: A few quotes and jokes

Postby olde coney » Fri Mar 14, 2014 7:40 am

:clap :lol: :lol: :lol:
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Re: A few quotes and jokes

Postby 666rog » Fri Mar 14, 2014 11:42 am

:D excellaent. I really do need to find a Greek bloke to tell that to. :silent
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Re: A few quotes and jokes

Postby Lou » Sat Mar 15, 2014 4:30 am

my future son-in-law is Greek :clap :up :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
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Re: A few quotes and jokes

Postby mike5ive » Tue Apr 01, 2014 11:56 am

A birthday card I received from a family member this year

I'm not going to make any age related jokes this year because I really do genuinely feel really bad
about how old you really are
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Re: A few quotes and jokes

Postby Rubbadub » Fri May 02, 2014 4:38 pm

Daughter sent me one

Happy Birthday,
in Dog years..........
.........................
.........................
.........................
.........................
.........................
.........................
.........................
.........................
....you're dead :lol:
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Re: A few quotes and jokes

Postby mike5ive » Wed Jul 09, 2014 10:25 pm

The dog years thing.....that's great
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Re: A few quotes and jokes

Postby crazy angel » Sat Oct 18, 2014 4:40 pm

Pakistani dies and goes to Heaven...

He knocks on the Pearly Gates and St. Peter opens them...

"Yes?", asks St. Peter. .

"I am here for Jesus", says the Pakistani...

St Peter turns around and shouts, "Jesus, your taxi's here"

:oops: :lol: :lol: :lol:
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Re: A few quotes and jokes

Postby mitsui spy » Sun Oct 19, 2014 4:25 pm

:lol:
Embarrassingly I have a real life version of that.
We have a wonderful friend who's half English and half Pakistani. She was born here and is utterly westernised. A couple of years ago she came to an afternoon party at our house but arranged for her father to come and pick her up. Her father's a practicing muslim. My brother didn't know this and saw the father coming up the drive. He shouts out loudly "HAS ANYONE ORDERED A CURRY?" :oops: :oops: :oops:
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Re: A few quotes and jokes

Postby 666rog » Thu Apr 09, 2015 10:31 am

An Australian Poetry Competition held in the
Sydney Opera House had come down to two finalists:

A) A university graduate.
B) An old aboriginal.

They were given a word, and then allowed two minutes to study the word
and come up with a short four line poem that contained the word.

The word they were given was 'TIMBUKTU'.

First to recite his poem was the university graduate.
He stepped to the microphone and said:

Slowly across the desert sand,
Trekked a lonely caravan
Men on camels, two by two
Destination - Timbuktu

The crowd went crazy !. No way could the old aboriginal top that, they thought.

The old aboriginal calmly made his way to the microphone and recited;

Me and Tim a huntin' went
Met three whores in a pop up tent
They were three, and we were two
So I bucked one, and Timbuktu.

The aboriginal won.
A TRUE STORY !
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Re: A few quotes and jokes

Postby tallyb » Thu Apr 09, 2015 6:45 pm

:D :D :D :D
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